Lately I've been on a search for what "true" friends really are and how many do I have. Obviously I have a lot less than I thought I did. People that I thought were my friends have proven me wrong. We've all had those people in our lives before that have hurt & betrayed us when we thought we were friends. Why is at age 27 that I'm learning all this? Why is it that I always let my guard down and get taken advantage of? God has given me such a love for people, but I feel like I'm always getting hurt by them. How do I tell the difference between real or fake? I'm the kind of person that is all or nothing. There is no medium with me, so by the time I give my all it usually bites me in the butt. I am finally going to set standards. Friends stick by you in the good and the bad. They won't lie to you even if they know it might hurt you. Friends celebrate your victories and mourn your losses. They tell you that dress makes your butt look big & not let you walk around all day while all your fake friends laugh and talk about it. They talk you out of bad life decisions, but if you choose to do it anyway they still stand by you. We've all encountered​ those friends that have talked bad about us behind our backs or shared a secret they weren't supposed to, and I’m sure at some point we’ve been that shameful friend too. I am on a quest to figure out how to love regardless of the hurtful things that I know my friends may eventually do. The Lord has blessed me with a hand full of these real friends. One of which is my amazing husband who stands by me and encourages me no matter what (he just better never tell me a dress makes my butt look big.) C.S. Lewis once said, "friendship is unnecessary​ like.. philosophy​.. like art..it has no survival value. Rather it has one of those things that give value to survival." Our lives would be boring and mundane and our jail cells would probably be less empty without friendships. The question still lies where do I draw the line from getting hurt by others? The answers lie in my heart and my judgment. Why don't I trust myself more? We all have that gut feeling. I think if we used it more often we'd be better off. I am making a heart change. I will continue to love people. I will continue to help those in need. I will not however be taken advantage of anymore. I will not continue to let my heart be torn. There are many things in my life that are about to change, but this is just one of my first. Thank you for all my real friends that have stood by me and watched me make stupid mistakes and loved me at my best and worst.

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Continue to follow me on my life’s journey. I would love for all of you to be a part of all the wonderful things happening in my life and maybe even some of the bad. Until next time…

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